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Shin Tokuyama     Generic Every Asiantown is an aptly named place! It's founded by a number of displaced asian multiversal residents after the Event that tore the Multiverse asunder. The place has become somewhat of a mecca for asian culture fans! It boasts a number of things to brag about.

    Not the least of which is Shen Yi Wong's Noodles And Teahouse. Famous the Multiverse over for having some of the best pan-Asian cuisine and teas from all over the world, it's a popular destination and almost always crammed wall-to-wall with people trying to get some delicious food and a good drink of something.

    Tonight is one such night! Why are you here? Is it to meet with friends? To try out new food? Are you sightseeing? The reason why you find yourself in this loud, crowded restaurant is best left to your imagination.
Sanary Rondel Not being formally employed by anyone has its perks. No schedules to follow beyond what's personally set, no bosses to worry about, not having to worry about being presentable... Yeah, Sanary's certainly been enjoying her time off.

     Today's another day of relaxation for the axe healer as she hangs out in Shen Yi Wong's, having heard of the spot through the grapevine and their rep for having good soup dumplings. She's not quite sure how that would even work, but there's a first for everything! Sanary's seated at a booth near the front of the store, waiting for her order while watching people coming and going with a lazy gaze and her hair barely tied up in a ponytail at all. At least her t-shirt looks clean!

     Surely today's going to be a nice quiet day with a nice quiet lunch. Surely.
Alopex     Because it's Ramen night! After the upheaval, at least one night a week needs to be dedicated to finding some good noodles to share with friends, allies, and aquaintences. Today, in particular, a certain fox has dragged along a certain ally to try out something authentic! Not one of those cheap, 10 cent ramen packages you can get at your local superstore. No, she -demanded- that true Ramen be had this day! And she had even made reservations. SO. Sitting, ordering, drinking, and chattering about recent goings-on while people watching.
Rebound Hey Rebound's not one to say no to free dinner. Besides she picked the place last time, when they ate at her favorite burger joint. This was Alopex's night to pick, and so noodles it was.

"Have you ever gone to one of those places where they cook the food at your table and the chef does like tricks and puts on a show of how he prepares the food?" Rebound asks, setting her drink down and leaning back in her seat a bit, "We should try to find one of those places if you haven't gone ot one before."
Samantha Middleton     Samantha has never had asian food, because she is not from one of those strange settings where the western people eat asian food for inexplicable reasons. Instead, this is ALL NEW to her. Living alone in a tiny town(well, mostly alone) keeps her from really enjoying that sort of multi-cultural experience.

    But now... NOW? Now she has a little money and a chance to enjoy it. Which is... suspect. Because she's trying to eat with a mechanical hand, using chopsticks to scoop up the ramen. The teenage girl is about as successful on her first try as anyone would expect, but at least she's making a valiant effort.
Kutsuuko Shiratori     So with all this shitty business where an impossible colony of anti-Fenrir jackasses has set up on what should be the first sight of prime satellite colony real-estate, Cradle Unit gets to sit on the sidelines until someone figures out what to do about it.

    Honestly, this is fine with Kutsuuko. She'd spent weeks and solid weeks dicking around in transports across the continent, without so much as good coffee for a vast majority of the time, barely seeing anyone. She counts this as shore leave, and hits up one of the new places after the Reality Quakes she was almost totally absent for, because Mutsumi is busy.

    Sanary is a familiar face! That means she shoulders through a couple of people and parks herself right across from her as if she had been expected, planting both of her elbows on the table, lacing her fingers, and giving her kind of a cheeky grin. "I didn't know you were into this kind of stuff. I thought you were a farmer? Did bacon get old? Because half this stuff has bacon in it, trust me."
Seifer Almasy      Seifer Almasy is here because Seifer Almasy is here. Honestly, that's it. There's no big reason or grand desire. There's no super huge need. He's not here for noodles, or Karal, or anything. He's not here to buy anything or drink anything or fight anything (yet). Seifer Almasy is here because Seifer Almasy's passtime, like all JRPG heroes, is wandering as far afield of any established place he's aware of in search of places to grind loot and skill.

     Seifer is vaguely aware of Sanary, and so gravitates into that direction (read: he kissed her on-stage while he was pretending to Celes and she was Locke). He holds up a hand and sits down.

     Slung across his back are a number of very asiatic swords, clinking and clanking as he moves. They are probably not for him.

     "Hey," he says, and to Kutsuuko. He doesn't say anything else. Instead, he looks off into the sky for a moment and gets an irritable look on his face, pulls out his wallet, and starts counting money.
Shin Tokuyama     The food winds up getting served and is all incredibly delicious. It's not hard to see why this place is a popular Multiversal tourist destination. THe food is affordable, delicious, and generally well-portioned. Of course, people start to notice strange things as they hang out here longer. None of the furniture seems built to be around for a while. It's a lot of Ikea tables and disposable parts.

    This mystery is solved after about 15 or 20 minutes into everyone's meal. As a bunch of things happen all at once.

    First, on one side of the room, there's a table of a group of men in suits. One of them stands up and draws a pair of guns, "This is a double-cross! Boss Ming sends his regards!" Another guy at the table stands up a moment later, "This is a TRIPLE CROSS! ASIAN CITY POLICE! You are all under arrest!" Everyone at the table is standing up and pulling guns on eachother, flipping tha table over as they stare one another down.

    At the same time, the front door blasts off its hinges and a half-dozen asian men in ski masks rush in with rifles, "This isn't any sort of cross! THIS IS A ROBBERY! EVERYONE ON THE GROUND AND GIVE US YOUR MONEY!" The men shoot their rifles into the ceiling to provide effect and to prove their point. People seem unsure how to act.

     AND THEN A MOMENT LATER, someone at a table on the far side of the room stands up and slams his palm on the table. It shatters to splinters, "No! This is not a robbery! This is a battle! This city killed my father and I learned kung fu to come back and get justice by cleaning it up! Prepare for my justice fist!"

    BUT IT'S NOT DONE! A dozen SWAT officers in uniforms flying dragon kick through the windows and land in the restaurant, taking kung fu poses, "ASIAN CITY MARTIAL ARTS SWAT TEAM!" THey all brandish nunchaku, "THIS IS A RAID! Everyone cooperate!"

    There's a long, few tense moments. It's as if the restaurant is waiting to see if anyone else is gonna jump in. After a couple silent moments, every situation erupts at once in a hail of gunfire, doves, kung fu, and an all-out brawl.

    This city's crime is as tropey as its cuisine.
Sanary Rondel So a fox, a kangaroo, a teenager with a robohand, and some soldiers walk into a bar...

     Wait. Soldiers? Familiar ones. Sanary sits up a bit as she tosses Kutsuuko and Seifer a lazy wave, a look of pleasant surprise crossing her face. "Hey, Kuts. Seif. Eh, heard this place was good and figured I'd stop by. Been eating lots of pork chops lately and... Too much good stuff gets boring, yeah." She laughs lightly and leans back in her seat, looking between the God Eater and... What /is/ Seifer's thing, anyway?

     Acting, maybe. And belting out songs like a goddamn pro. She's got a thoughtful look in her eye as she munches on her food, requesting a few extra plates for Kutsuuko and Seifer just in case. "I don't mind the bacon, at least. Think they got it in these soup dumplings? Never heard of 'em, but... Stuff's good. Anyway."

     Sanary smacks a hand on her table,and then leans in with a curious grin on her face. "What've you been up to? Uh. Both of you Haven't seen..." Another pause, and then she nods lightly at Seifer. "... Well, I saw you pretty recently. But yeah, you two keeping busy? Uh... Happen to need any healers around for anything?"

     Right. Being her own boss on the farm is great, but money's also nice.

     AND THEN EVERYTHING GOES TO HELL there's something about crosses and police and... Fisting? THat doesn't sound right. Sanary sips her milk tea noisily during that tense moment, and then she's quick to...

     Actually, the healer just slides further back into her booth while watching it all. She's not about to miss a show like this, but she /is/ going to hover over the food protectively! And possibly keep an eye on the teenager with the robohand just in case. "Heads down!"
Seifer Almasy      Oh look a convenient karate battle.

     Oh look a convenient karate battle with a Hot-Blooded Protagonist and two different schools of martial artists.

     Seifer doesn't have the martial arts movie background other people do. Movies in his world are...slow to come out. One of the biggest movies in Galbadia is still a movie from fifteen years ago thanks to the grinding world war the world has known for ages. As a result of this, Seifer is momentarily distracted from answering Sanary, his mouth half-open in response before it shuts to just.../watch/. And watch. And...be fascinated.

     And then he decides, what the hell, he might as well get involved.

     "Like hell," he tells Sanary, "I finally get to answer the age-old question - Knights or Samurai!" If only he had a photograph and fifteen minutes to stand still for it to take, so he could send it over the intranet to that Axe Samurai kid in the Garden. /Fuck/ a Tale of Two Castles. The Sorceress's Knight is where it's at.

     Seifer hops up on the table of the booth and spins his gunblade out of its sholster, levelling it at the other members of the raid.

     "ANYBODY WHO WANTS TO EAT SOME HIGH-QUALITY WOOD, GET OVER HERE!"

     He pauses. "What?" he says to thin air.

     His face suddenly goes red.

     "THE FLOOR!" Seifer hurriedly corrects himself, pointing at the floor, his face flush and angry, "I MEANT THE FLOOR! I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND, KIND OF! IT MIGHT NOT BE SERIOUS! I DUNNO YET! BUT I DEFINITELY MEANT THE FLOOR, AND NOT...ANYTHING ELSE, YOU FUCKIN' WEIRDOS!"
Samantha Middleton     Sluuuurp. She's just gonna... take a drink of that broth! Nobody will notice, right? Samantha is mid-slurp when everything EXPLODES... into action! It's a really, really awkward moment for her, just staring with her bowl at her lips as the entire place goes crazy with double, triple, and something or other crosses. Who should she pay attention to? She has no idea!
    The clockpunk teenager has all of a few seconds to decide before she decides... to dive under cover! She doesn't have Fido with her, she's not really up for taking on the entire room by herself! The girl kicks over her own table, mechanical leg proving to have a lot of heft to the kick! But she isn't going to jump into fighting, that would be crazy!
    As soon as she gets behind cover, a small metal ball, like a softball that ticks loudly, rolls out from behind the table and thunks against the leg of a table two tables down. Anyone on HER side of Sam's table will see her fumbling to extend an antenna from a boxy device.
Kutsuuko Shiratori     Kutsuuko looks at the guy wandering in with a pile of swords with the kind of blankly curious stare of someone trying to discern whether a wandering cat belongs to someone or might have rabies instead. When he sits down at the table, she assumes he probably knows Sanary, and so responds with a mildly drawn out "Hey." in return.

    "Ah, don't worry about it." the God Eater then finally exclaims, getting out her card. "You're a friend of Sanary right? I'm already intruding here. It's no problem." There's no doubt that her job pays a metric ton more than Sanary's at least.

    Unfortunately, while she's sorting out the bill and her order, all culturally ambiguous hell breaks out in this cozy restaurant, and Kutsuuko is left outright dumbfounded while the ridiculous series of events plays out, straight out of one of those old world movies you can dig up on the NORN terminals. She almost doesn't know how to respond to it, but then the idea comes to her that this is probably her first real gig as a Paladin.

    She doesn't kick the table over when she stands up. That'd knock off all the delicious food (that she hopes isn't going to get cold). Instead, she stands right out in the open with her officer's sidearm drawn (more or less a really beefy .50 for someone with enhanced strength, with some glowy orange lines), training it on the first group to pull guns, and keeping it there even as she has to turn and stare, brow furrowed and lips partially agape, at Seifer.

    "Chevaliar Shiratori, Paladins Elite division! Boss Ming can eat it, crooks can go with the cops, and you can have your justice some other time you psycho!"
Rebound The kangaroo just looks across the table at the fox, "One time. Just one goddamn time. Is that so much to ask for?" She asks, as she scoops up some noodles on a pair of chopsticks before she picks up the bowl, "No, screw it. I'm getting my dinner." She stands up from her seat, taking the bowl of noodles with her, reaching back with one of her feet to grab the chair with the tip of her foot. She wheels around on her other foot, getting enough rotation to launch the chair through the air.

Said chair flies through the air like a bullet, flying towards one of the guys with the rifles that just bust in to rob the place. They remind her too much of the Purple Dragons from back home. It's setting off a hair in the back of her neck.
Alopex     "Oh, a steakhouse? I think I know a few, but if you know one, it's your turn next, so, you can decide," Alopex muses, eagerly awaiting the delivery of the ramen bowl she ordered. "I haven't been to one -recently-, so it may be worth a visit. I imagine in the multiverse they have a lot more tricks then the regular 'train volcano' and lighting oil on fire," she muses before sipping at some tea that was brought to the table earlier.

    And finally, the main course! The fox's bowl is brought out, a nod is given the waitress, a light bow to the bowl, chopsticks are split, and then she digs in. "There is nothing quite like an authentic bowl, Rebound," Alopex muses, glancing up. There... seems to be something going on? People are yelling, some are hiding, some are diving, tables are flipping, there's a slurp in the silence only matched by the fox doing the -exact- same thing. "Mm," is the only response Rebound gets before a chair is sent flying across the room. Alopex, probably the one person that would -belong- in a flick like this decides to do something.

    You know that one person that simply stays in their seat, continuing to mind their own business? The one that you just know the moment they get up there will be hell to pay? Well, right now? The fox-ninja is far more interested in finishing her bowl. In fact, she barely moves when the windows are blasted in, leaning to one side just enough to avoid a large bit of glass striking her. And yet she still continues her dinner.

    She'll be with you all in a minute.
Shin Tokuyama     People either retreating into booths or flipping over tables to go under them are making the right call! No one is bothering Sanary or Samantha! No one has even noticed the ticking metal ball that Samantha threw out in the first place, in fact! It lands near the feet of the justice junkie from earlier. She's got some space to get herself set up and her systems operating normally, if she's taking the time to do that. However, that guy is raising his foot to prepare to crush her little orb thing. Sanary's generally not being directly attacked. However, either of them may get hit by flying debris as the entire place erupts into a free-for-all.

    The fighting quickly engulfs the main dining room. It doesn't seem to stray farther than the front door and it doesn't seem to stray into the kitchen. In fact, people seem to be deliberately avoiding fighting near the kitchen doors and errantly knocking someone through them. Aside from that, the fighting is pretty much everywhere.

    Seifer stands up and grandstands. The members of the Police Raid take his boasting and weapon pointing as a challenge and start to circle him. They're all swinging their nunchaku now, "Listen, pal. Cooperate with the local authorities or we're gonna give you a case of summer teeth." "Yeah. Some're here. Some're there."

    The brawling is increasing through the restaurant, in intensity and scale of violence. Kutsuuko flashes a badge and a gun and tells people they're gonna start complying! Most people now associate her as part of this huge furball that's happening in the restaurant. The result is that someone comes at her from behind and tries to break a wooden chair over her back.

    Rebound's chair hits one of the gang of robbers. It shatters against his face and torso and knocks him out flat, sending him slumping down against the wall. The others turn and open fire on Rebound's (and Alopex's) general area with a volley of assault rifle rounds that people seem to be mysteriously aware of and able to clear a path for amidst all the fighting.
Sanary Rondel ... Did he really just say that? He did." Sanary's cheeks are already starting to puff out some as she tries to hold in immature snickers, but she just loses it and laughs rather inappropriately when Seifer goes red and starts... Talking to himself?

     That helps keep it in a little, at least. She's still snickering, of course, but Sanary does get herself back under control as it looks like the mechanic girl's doing... Something! What a curious little controller. The healer doesn't look too worried about the whole situation, at least, as Seifer, Kutsuuko, and Rebound all seem ready to keep it under control.

     Well, Kutsuuko does. Seifer and Rebound... She's not so sure. Still, that is some gusto, and it looks like it's just Alopex and Samantha with enough sense not to get involved. Even the healer's standing up after a while, whipping her tomahawk off her belt and bracing it against her shoulder finally. It's an attempt at a nonchalant, yet still cool pose, but...

     It'd be cooler if she didn't immediately get hit in the face with chunk of falling plaster. Still, it's salvageable if she just makes a witty one liner! "We-" And then she gets beaned with a flying chair. Come oooon. Sighing lightly as the opportunity to look cool is thoroughly dashed, Sanary instead turns her attention to...

     Actually, she's not sure where to direct her frustration now. Instead, she's just scowling angrily and sending generally threatening looks to the fighters in the restaurant, gangsters and police alike. It's not like she knows who threw that chair, but she can at least look menacing about it.
Alopex     A sigh slips from Alopex, mostly in Rebound's direction, "Did you really fling a chair at people with -guns-, Rebound?" the fox asks, still working on a 3/4ths full bowl despite the absolute PANDEMONIUM going on all around. For a moment it seems like the fox is about to join the fray. She stands, bowl in both hands. However, just before the men with guns open fire, she lifts a leg, steps -down- on the table, setting it on it's end. At that point she has a seat, lotus style, behind the table, and actually KEEPS EATING. Seriously. Doesn't anyone in the room understand how long it has been since she's had -good- Ramen? Clearly not. Clearly she's trusting Rebound to deal with the insanity. At least for a few minutes.

        Sluuuuurp. "These are really good noodles."
Samantha Middleton     HEY! Why is Justice Junkie attacking her ball? Samantha scowls and shouts, "DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH MY BALLS!" She doesn't like, attack him or anything though. Seems like a kindred spirit! Instead the little globe /rolls/ away at high speed, heading toward the robbers instead. Because why not lead him to doing something useful!

    This will probably backfire spectacularly, but in the meantime there's a little ball rolling around controlled by Sam's remote!
Rebound "Not my fault!" Rebound replies to Alopex, as she dives for cover. She lands and slides behind a booth as bullets strike around her. She takes a moment to tilt her whole bowl of noodles into her mouth, and starts chewing. She's not about to let the noodles get away from her that easily.

She pops out from behind her booth cover and flings the bowl at one of the shooters, hopping over the booth and onto the table, where the patrons have already scattered from the gunfire. She hops up again, and then drops down on the edge of the table, flipping it over and throwing all the contents of it, bowls of noodles, a plate of sushi and a pot of hot tea, towards the gunmen. She then picks up the flipped table and holds it in front of her, so she can close the gap between herself and them.
Kutsuuko Shiratori     "Hey! HEY! I'm talking to you!" Kutsuuko yells fruitlessly out into the fray, brandishing the big gun, but not at any point close to firing it. She's actually just put it away, flicking the safety back on and reaching for something else from her belt, when some enterprising asshole smashes a chair over her! Even if it's IKEA furniture, that hurts! She staggers under the jerktacular sucker hit, holding the back of her head with one hand, and yelling "Oh for fuck's /sake/!" so loudly that her smokey voice cracks at the end.

    Now she's got splinters and dust in her jacket and hair as well, which double upsets her. She wheels on the guy behind her, not even looking who it is before shouting "That's assaulting an officer, asshole!" and grabbing him by the front of his clothes, and twisting sharply to hurl him over her shoulder and into center restaurant, and quite probably onto some poor sap's food.

    Whatever he hits, he will hit much harder than he hit her. Kutsuuko isn't much of a kung-fu fighter, but she swings around an fighter jet cannon like a baseball bat for a job. For that reason she feels confident stepping up on the next table, stomping it loudly so she can crack her knuckles in dramatic fashion, with the little tensing noises on her ballistic glove and everything. "Anyone else want some?!"
Seifer Almasy      Seifer is silent for a moment, like he can't believe what just happened. Then...

     "Oh, man! Summer teeth! That was great!" He slaps his knee and laughs loudly, and honestly, because that is about on the level of 'chicken-wuss' which is his personal favorite insult. Seifer hops over some hurled debris and then lands in front of the booth, swaggering his trademark swagger forward as his gunblade swings through the air, doing absolutely nothing but looking *really badass*.

     Then he gets whanged by a plate. It shatters on his face and draws blood.

     Seifer stumbles backwards. His hand goes to his face. He's already got a scar! Shit!

     "Hey, shit!" he shouts at the air, "Are girls okay with guys with lots of scars on their face?!"

     It must be a cultural thing.

     "Fuck!" he shouts, "That's it! Everybody gets to eat it!"

     And then Seifer just dives right into the fray. He doesn't seem to care which side he's attacking - legitimate SWAT POLICE, NINJA MAFIA, or HIRO PROTAGONIST, Seifer dives right in without thinking. His blade whirls and spins with flurry and fury, dancing with nunchaku and tables. Seifer grabs a tablecloth off another table and uses it like a bullfighting cape as he wades into the fray.

     "EVERYBODY CAN GET FUCKED! KNIGHT V. ALL COMERS! BRING IT ON, YOU SAMURAI JACKASSES! I'LL FUCK YOU UP SO BAD I'LL BE THE LORD OF KICKING YOUR ASSES! YOU'LL ONLY EVER SAY MY NAME WITH A 'DAMN, YO' IN FRONT OF IT!"

     He stops and ducks an incoming attack, looking off into the air. "/Really? 'Damn, yo?' That's your best? God damn, I shouldn't listen to you. Who's even gonna get a pun that fucking obscure?"

     He swings backwards as a chair comes at him, knocking it upwards and back into the guy opposite him with the hilt of his gunblade. "Shouting 'Morphing Time' does *not* automatically make anything I say cool! Shut up, Greg! If you got nothin' useful to say don't say shit! God damn!"
Shin Tokuyama     It's none of the aforementioned groups that hit Sanary with a chair and also some plaster! Instead, it's the guy sitting over at Table Six. Who was secretly a master of Jeet Kune Do and is currently round-house kicking an old lady who was wielding a three-section staff and beating up a group of school children who had swords. The stuff that hit her came from the direction of that general scuffle.

    Rifle rounds smack into the table that Alopex is hiding behind. Eventually, they start punching through and only missing her by a hair's breadth at the most, so she better start being careful soon. The rifle rounds do let up a bit as Rebound starts throwing food and charging in. One man gets hit in the face with hot broth and tea, falling to the ground and clutching at his face as Rebound closes in.

    The Kung Fu Justice Hero is chasing the small ball led by Samantha towards the crime syndicate having a quintuple cross. As his foot tries to stomp it, he instead kicks the floor and upends a floorboard, sending the crime member on top of it flying straight up and through the roof of the building. Samantha is leading him along pretty well.

    A guy tossed over Kutsuuko's shoulder lands in the midst of the five gunmen, all of whom turn towards her. As they stare her down, a flock of doves wistfully flies through the restaurant before all five men start firing at her. They're charging in towards her while firing, unloading with handguns as they slide over tables, bannisters, and firing guns all John Woo style.

    "Thanks, man! The chef in the back gave us some tips!" One of the officers says proudly as Seifer expresses approval for the two-liners they used as they surrounded him. When he gets hit in the face with a tablecloth, one looks concerned, "Woah man, you okay?" "Yeah, some chicks dig scars." "Varies from chick to chick." And then they've all lunging for Seifer in a whirlwind of nunchaku, a few tablelegs, and maybe a chair across the back. Still, he's managing to lay out a LOT of them as he fights.
Sanary Rondel Oh, that BASTARD. Or those bastards. There's... A lot of people over there. And weapons. Why do those kids have weapons? This place isn't supposed to be like Plegia! Vaulting over the back of her booth and realizing shortly thereafter that she could have just walked, Sanary approaches table six with a sterner tone in her voice than her mismatched appearance in that t-shirt and shorts with a freaking tomahawk would imply.

     "Oi! Let's calm it down, huh? This is a place for eating, not fighting!" Sanary calls out with as much authority in her voice as she can muster, glancing among the various combatants while trying to actively put herself in between all of them. She might not have their training or dexterity or... Weird spryness considering how old that grandma is, but the healer /is/ certainly lacking in good self-preservation instincts!

     At least she's tough. That might count for something. She'll just have to hope everyone else can take care of themselves.
Seifer Almasy      "YOU CAN FIGHT WHERE YOU EAT!" Seifer shouts at Sanary, "AIN'T YOU NEVER HEARD OF A FOOD FIGHT BEFORE?!"

     Seifer's ability to parry and reverse is frankly astounding. A large number of the attacks turned on him simply go back on their originators as his Gunblade spins, whirls, and dances like it's a ballerina through the oncoming storm. He's fucking crazy good with that insane, stupid-looking pistol-sword.

     On the flip side, no matter how good he is, he's still only human, and he shines in duels, not versus the masses. The chair finds its purchase in his back, sending Seifer squarely across a conveniently-placed busboy trolley full of dirty dishes. He skids along, knocking aside glass and china, hits the counter it's up next to, and then flips over it, landing firmly on a pot of wonton noodles.

     His jacket catches on fire.

     Seifer is, understandably, immensely pissed. He comes out of those wontons like a bat out of Hell, leaping onto the same busboy trolley that had delivered him to his coat's own personal inferno. He surfs it forward towards the melee like a guy who might be famous for fighting in a ladder factory holding a baby, taking wide, uncharacteristic slashes with his gunblade and firing rounds into the sword part to make it vibrate furiously. That makes it hurt a lot more.

     Basically Seifer is pissed and On Fire and he'll either douse himself or kick some ass and *then* douse himself, he's not sure which.
Kutsuuko Shiratori     Of course Kutsuuko would wind up staring down the group with guns. If a bunch of martial artist bar brawlers ran at her in single file, this would be easy. It's never allowed to be easy. She briefly pauses cracking her knuckles as all the weapons are pointed her way, with deep consideration visible in her eyes as they flick from gun barrel to gun barrel, before finally joining in on the trope and getting her boot under the table to kick it up in the way.

    That is, she doesn't kick it over so she can duck behind it, but rather she kicks it straight /into/ the five gunmen, launching the furniture down their center line in order to force them to split up, or get bowled over. Some of the bar brawl attitude drains out of her as she lowers herself, feeling her pulse speed up, her adrenaline spike, and her Oracle Cells start lighting up, tracing the flash of gunfire in her augmented peripheral vision, and predicting the shots as best she can. An instant later, the floor is added to the collateral bill, and Kutsuuko disappears straight down the middle of the lane she had cleared, ripping up the boards where she dives between their arcs of fire at the hardest angle to follow.

    She ducks sideways mid-charge, veering sharply where a bullet rips just past her ear without flinching, and twists her course into the firer, sharply bringing her fist around into the center of his chest with just enough restraint that she figures it won't kill him. She digs her heels in and turns again, ducking through a volley of double handgun bullets, but where one catches her in the back, thwacking against her Fenrir jacket and leaving a nasty mark beneath the bulletproof fiber.

    Up the banister she goes, attempting to retain momentum. Kutsuuko outright hops onto the railing and charges up it in an act of considerably impressive balance, gunning right for the guy sliding down it and hopping up to kick him in the face, and use that as a springboard to flip behind something solid on the second floor and take stock of the situation, peeking around to keep track of the other three she'd put behind her.

    "Damn this mess. Can't I get even one day of leave where something doesn't happen?" Kutsuuko mutters to herself, clutching at her belt again and unlatching one of the hardcases. "Who the hell are these other nutjobs too? Bunch of animal people and- is that an RC?"
Alopex     A half bowl later, Alopex is about a quarter-way from being done. The way her body, and even head, tilts occasionally, it would SEEM she's dodging the bullets, but the movements are so subtle it's actually hard to tell! Thankfully, before the table is a pile of splinters, Rebound sends a whole mess of things toward the men wielding the guns. As the spray of bullets seems to fade, the fox takes hold of her bowl and starts to down the last quarter. As she does so, a particular bullet-shot sounds a lot louder than the rest. It bounces off one of the trays on the busboy cart, ricochet's off the ceiling, hits the floor just beside Alopex, and then- .. well it misses her.

    However it cleanly split the bowl in half.

    The remaining broth splashes to the ground, some of it on Alopex's lap, and she just sits there, staring at an empty bowl, half of it in each hand. A sigh is heard, the dish is gently set down on the ground, and then she stands. She takes a moment to dust herself off, slips to a somehow still intact table, uses a few napkins, and then skims the room. Her head slooooowly turns toward the man that shot the bullet who has at this point, has made eye contact with Alopex and is turning as white as her fur. She takes a single step, moves to lunge, and then has a man-on-fire surfing a bussing-cart crash right into her as he's swinging for the fences at everyone inside.

        "HEY!"
Rebound How did that guy even get on fire?! Rebound has reached the guys with the guns, but they have scattered and she can't fight all of them at once with just two hands. At least Alopex seems to be finally intent on getting into the fight, "About time!" She calls out, just in time to see Alopex get crashed into by cart man, "Hey!" Now she's not happy her friend is being interrupted from her noodle based revenge mission.

She grabs the closest guy, one of the police officers, and hauls him through the air, "Stop interrupting our fight with your fight! Don't you know anything about fight etiquite!?" She yells at Seifer, before throwing the cop at him, aiming to knock him off of his sweet bus boy themed ride
Samantha Middleton     Too much violence! Not that Sam minds violence normally, but she was trying to eat and she can't figure out which side to pick! So she hits a button on her little contraption, allowing it to pop the top off and start shooting bullets all over! Or around the quad-cross and the Justice Junkie anyway. Except it's the size of a softball, so there isn't much room for actual bullets. It's more like pelting a bunch of BBs all over.
    Whatever, because it gives her a chance to start crawling toward the door. Which works all great and everything until she realizes that getting to the door is... not the easiest of tasks! There's crashing tables and noodles flying and here she is on all fours scurrying away.
    Sigh.
    Samantha finally joins the fight. "I'm too young for this!" But it's said as she flings a chair at one of the bar patrons and retreats, heading for the kitchen instead.
Shin Tokuyama     Justice Junkie goes down to a spray of BBs that really sting and cause him to fall to the ground clutching the pinprick welts that they leave all over his body as he rolls around and makes vague whining noises, "Ow ow ow! OW!" He complaints.

    Fights are starting to cross over all over the place. Kutsuuko's gun battle overlaps with the huge free for all that is Seifer's brawl with the cops, bullets whizzing through the melee expertly as people are exchanging shots and a couple guys go down to Kutsuuko's firing line.

    Likewise, the fight with Alopex and Rebound is also starting to intersect with Seifer's, letting people have a giant brawl. Except for...

    Samantha Middleton. Who enters the kitchen.

    Standing in the kitchen, running basically all of it is a man in a leisure suit and an apron, with a bandana tied around his head and sunglasses covering heterochromatic eyes. He's dutifully cooking about 30 different dishes at once and expertly managing them all as he idly looks towards the door, "You better not be in here to fight. They'll wrap up soon, though. This happens every day around this time, yo!"

                      Unaggro'd Secret Boss: Shin Tokuyama                      
Sanary Rondel "No! Wait. Yeah! But that's a waste of food!" Sanary shouts back at Seifer as Grandma Rod spins about with the Sword Children hopping on and off of her staff like weirdly choreographed monkeys and Kick Brother launches another goddamn chair.

     "I mean, if you're gonna fight, at least use stuff that-" Sanary gets another chair to the faec, staggering briefly before shooting both a glare and approving look at the culprit. "Yes, like that! Nobody's gonna eat a chair, anyway!" She wipes some blood off her forehead while breaking into a run at Kick Brother, eating a solid kick to the side before tackling him in a much less technical display of... Anything.

     "I mean, seriously! Who even came up with the idea of using food for that, anyway?!" She's actually starting to sound pissed off. Grandma Rod, meanwhile, continues whipping her namesake around like a one-person geriatric helicopter, and the Sword Children are starting to bound and backflip all around Table Six just to avoid getting beaned in the face or shot by all the gunfighting going on not too far away.
Samantha Middleton     Samantha brushes herself off and walks into the kitchen... and her little toy runs out of pellets and shuts down. Or, um. Winds down, because clockwork. But in the kitchen is where the important stuff is happening! She holds up her hands and shakes her head! "What? No! I'm not here to what happened to your eyes?"
    There are important mysteries to investigate, and Samantha has never met a heterochromic person before. The fight outside is totally forgotten despite all the gunfire she's been trying to stay out of. Even if she has a gun tucked away in her arm. Shooting random people seems a little weird.
Kutsuuko Shiratori     Kutsuuko is not in the kitchen. Kutsuuko does not hear the whole deal about this happening every day. To her, this is still a brawl that directly meets the established guidelines of disturbing the peace. She'd been trained as a God Eater, not military police, but she knows a few things about how they work.

    While the bullets whud against her steadily eroding piece of cover, she successfully locates and pulls the lever on a Fenrir issue stun grenade. The things are massively overkill for human targets, working something like a flashbang that lasts for several full seconds instead of a split instant, with jamming signals and sub/supersonic screeching mixed in, but she tosses it high over the second floor railing anyways, letting it sail into the middle of the room, near the ceiling, where it should go off with maximum effect; or at the very least, force everyone to look down.
Shin Tokuyama     Shin Tokuyama finishes putting the finally touches on a plate of gyoza with special dipping sauce and a bowl of pho that he puts down on a platter. He grabs a towel and starts cleaning the chef knife in his hand, "Ah. You've noticed my eyes. You see."

    Shin adjusts his sunglasses, "No one has ever asked about them before. But when I reached a true mastery of the martial arts, I developed what's known as the gaze of the warrior. One eye holds the mastery of all martial arts that have ever been. The other eye holds the key to all martial arts which have yet to become. And I, in the present, can look upon and learn from both." He says to her in a story of questionable truth.
Seifer Almasy      "No!" Seifer shouts at Rebound, "Because that's not a fucking thing!"

     The cop hits him square in the chest, which sends him sprawling, and, again, still on fire, into the walls.

     The paper walls.

     The paper and wooden walls.

     The /highly flammable/ paper and wooden walls.

     Let's skip to the end here - the wall catches on fire, as does the wall of the building Seifer was thrown into, which happens to be a very nice open bath for you to lounge in after your meal.

     Seifer swears loudly as he pulls himself up, drags off his coat, and starts beating the fire *with the coat*, trying to put out both the fire on the torn wall and the fire on his coat.

     He will be out of this fight for the forseeable future as he attempts to Contain Problems rather than Fight Mans.
Alopex     After the crash, and flying for a moment before being forcefully introduced to a wall that is NOT on fire currently, Alopex groggily gets back onto her feet, shakes her head, and resumes her original quest. She stomps over to the man that broke her bowl, takes him by the collar even as he apologizes over and over, and then takes a step and heaves him over her shoulder through the door, and out into the street. She then repeats this with the next person she sees with a gun.. then another... then another. She's repeating this a LOT. "GET OUT!"

        Yup. The ninja is mad.
Sanary Rondel After punching the hell out of Kick Brother in return for all those damn chairs, Sanary gets back up with a bloody lip and a still bleeding forehead. Could she heal it up easily? Yes. This looks cooler, though, and she-wait.

     Things are on fire. This is not the sort of thing she wants to get caught up in, especially if anyone starts trying to dish out property damage. Instead of sticking around, Sanary just starts running right past the epic flame-tinged battle surrounding Kutsuuko, Seifer, Alopex, Rebound, Samantha, the police, the gangsters, JUSTICE, Sword Children, and Grandma Rod.

     "I'll catch up with you later! I left a... Pork in the oven!" And so, the healer runs. She just books it, never to return again*.

* Okay, maybe next week when the insurance has kicked in and it's safe to eat. Ordering to go isn't that bad.
Samantha Middleton     The flash bang goes off at an odd time. Samantha is wide-eyed, "Wow that's pretty cool! I don't know any mar-" And then the loud bang goes off behind her. She's in another room, so at least she's spared the disorienting part, but that is still very loud and right behind her!
    "ARE YOU SURE IT WILL BE ALL RIGHT?" Hey, she wasn't prepared for that!
Rebound Rebound is still battling with everyone she can manage to get her hands on. Sure stuff's on fire, but this is pretty normal for her. Still things are probably getting a little out of hand, even for her. Now she's fighting some of the cops too, "Alopex! Time to go!" She yells out at the fox, motioning for her friend to follow her. They probably should get the heck out of dodge before this whole place burns down to the ground.
Alopex     Toss. Toss. One last toss, and then Rebound's call snaps her out of it. A nod is given the roo, and then Ninja-Fox dashes out the door, and out into the wild, likely giving the guy that shot her bowl another medium-strength kick for ruining her dinner.